Friday, October 9, 2009

October...

Since he crashed my beautiful bike he has come back twice to pay me $200.  The first time I cried so hard, he told me he made up his mind and he was leaving.  "I don't want you anymore."  After he said that I explained to come to the bedroom.  He did.  We lied there, me in his arms and on his chest.  As I cried I told him, "This is home. Not this house, not this room, not this bed...here in your arms, this is home.  I love you." He told me he had to go get a haircut.

As he left that day I had to let go...bold face "I don't want you" I don't have to worry about calling, text, or thinking about.  I never knew him.  

Everyday is filled with 2xdays at the gym.  I've lost 16lbs. in 3 weeks.  My appetite does not exist, I live on shakes, cliff bars, and water.  Occasional tuna and cottage cheese when I am starving.  I don't know what to do...

I am trying to move on.

No comments:

Post a Comment